A Procrastinator’s Guide to Navy

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Listen, I get it. It’s Saturday morning, you’re lying in bed in your dorm, hungover as shit, wanting to do nothing for the foreseeable future. Well just one little problem…

GET THE FUCK UP!!!!!! IT’S FUCKING GAMEDAY!!!!!!

Thats right, its time to break out the Burnetts, crack open a few natty lites and get amped because the Huskies are getting ready to make the case for a 2-0 start. Since it’s an away game  you’re going to want to hit Ted’s bar early to get a good seat near the big screen and be surrounded by the Husky faithful. One o’clock should be enough time to cram a couple beavers in before kickoff and by then that hangover will be long gone.

It might just be me but I’m not a huge fan of playing service academies for the sole reason that I have too much respect for our men and women in uniform to shit talk them. So this week I’ll be talking about how great UConn is as opposed to how bad Navy is.

Speaking of UConn, good things all around for the Huskies as the line for the game this week dropped from UConn +7.5 when it opened to +3.5 where it sits now. This means that Bobby D and the boys must have had a great week in practice as Navy was the heavy favorite before the season started. Personally, I’m going to hammer the UConn moneyline at +160 so I can maximize our profit when the boys in blue shut down the Navy triple option right from the get go. Maybe I’ll bet the spread too just to hedge my bet a little.

For UConn to win todays game a couple things are going to need to go right. For starters the Huskies are going to have to shut down the run game from the get go. Navy is well known for their triple option offense, so half of this game is going to be excruciating to watch. I despise the run game so Navy is once again not my favorite opponent. Lucky for us, Bobby Diacs has played against the triple option more than just about any other coach in the country. He played Navy every year when he was at Notre Dame and he faced it three times in his UConn career over the past two seasons. The Huskies showed great run containment against Maine so this hopefully shouldn’t be a problem today in Annapolis. Add in a forcing a couple turnovers and we should be able to hold off the Midshipmen in their second matchup.

What’s most important about this game is that it’ll really serve as a litmus test(listen up chem majors) to see how good this UConn squad can really be. If the Huskies can pull off a win here then I have no doubt they can beat Virginia next week and Syracuse right after. If you get these Huskies sitting at 4-0 rolling into Houston, you never know what’ll happen(All aboard the CFP hype train! CHOO! CHOO! MOTHERFUCKERS!).

After hearing reports from practice all week, I’m convinced that last weeks matchup against the Blackbears played out exactly like Bob wanted it to. I think that he didn’t want to put any real plays out there so the Midshipmen wouldn’t have any useful game tape to watch. If you notice last week, after that scoop-and-score with ten minutes to go in the fourth, UConn had an incredibly efficient drive to tie it up and then again at the end of the fourth to seal the deal. Look out for Bob to break out some plays you’ve never seen before, and FOR THE LOVE OF GOD PLEASE AIR IT OUT!!!

Final score? UConn 27 Navy 17

Now Get up. Start Drinking. and get to your nearest UConn bar. It’s fucking gameday.